Wednesday, October 2, 2013

A Mother's Anguish

It has been almost two years since I have posted here.  So many things have happened.  So many beautiful signs of progress, countless joyous moments and reasons to celebrate.  There have also been many challenging times and periods of setbacks.  We have a lot to catch up on, but first I need to post something that is not about Evan.  Actually it is about Evan and all the families with children with autism.  It is about how the media and society can shape how people view our community and our children.  It is about how they can inspire understanding and compassion, but they can also do irreversible damage.  Her is my recent email to People magazine regarding their coverage of the Kelli Stapleton story:

I am a long time reader and loyal fan of People magazine.  I take my VIP surveys, check my People app daily and look forward to receiving the magazine every weekend.  Your celebrity coverage is second to none.  Your stories of our country's tragedies and local heroes is always inspiring.

That is why I was so appalled by your coverage of the Kelli Stapleton story.  Your story seemed to sympathize with the attempted murderer.  There is never a good reason to try and murder anyone let alone your own child and yet your story seemed to convey that her gruesome and selfish act was JUSTIFIED.  The autism community was in an uproar and extremely disappointed at your irresponsible and heartless view.  My son has autism and on the days that are exceptionally hard I dig deep and try to remember to have hope, to stay positive, to work harder and remind myself being his advocate, coach and cheerleader is my most important job.  On the days that are most challenging I love him more.  These days make me stronger and make me a BETTER mother.

When reading the latest issue I noticed your small article on page 10 "Update: A Mother's Anguish."   I thought that maybe People will show the other side and try to right the wrong of their first article.  Of course, the headline "A Mother's Anguish" clearly again shows sympathy to a mother who tried to MURDER HER CHILD.  And every quote you pulled from your readers' letters also supported Kelli Stapleton. "A loving mom,"  "shouldn't be sent to prison," "protecting her family."  How can the reputable and responsible People magazine stand behind and completely support an attempted murderer?  It is not even as if you are showing BOTH points of view and conducting fair journalism.  You are clearly justifying and supporting a mother who tried to murder her daughter.  Her daughter has autism and has violent outbursts.  This is something that MANY families deal with.  Are you suggesting every mother should be allowed to murder their child because they are disabled and have challenging behaviors?  Is it also OK to physically abuse a child who has autism or a child who is disabled?  I cannot believe that People magazine would write and follow up on a story in such an irresponsible and disgusting manner that depicts unwavering support and compassion for a mother who tried to murder her daughter.  I am appalled and sick to my stomach over your coverage of the Kelli Stapleton story and my heart breaks for the innocent Issy Stapleton.